burnburnburn

it's not the right time!stupid retarded! [=.=']

okayy,i know i suppose to control myself especially right now on hari raya eve!the thing is,i regreted every second i miss my brother when he's not here.duhhh,afiqah sakinah the ice-cold-heartless girl is missing her pathetic brother!shoot am i hving my PMS?

at first everthing seem to be fine,and suddenly just like a thunder in the sky,we fight and i felt like crying because it clearly involved about 'hijab'.okayy i admit tht i'm 16 and whatsoever,i'm a teenage and i should understand bout aurat and everything.i'm looking forward to wear tudung when i'm form 5.oh i know some of you would condemned me to be 'gile ta beragama' or some other sarcastic words.but puh-lease,i need my space.i'll change!i promise tht!

the story begin when we're at opah's and suddenly he barfed out this:

him:hish,ma tgk ika tu,dh la ta pkai tudung.pakailah!kafir betulla.

my mom doesn't say a word because she know how i felt in the inside seeing her daughter face changed simultaneously.i couldn't accept the fact tht he say the 'macam kafir' word.sarcastic bastard!oh well,the sarcasm doesn't stop there.suprisingly,it continue..

him:opahh,tgk ika ni opahh,ta pkai tudung

shittttttt!man i was like,oh hell oh darn brat! :'(
my dad see the changes in my face and just stare at me,haven't got the gut to say anything worrying tht i could cry there
i was crying but not too obvious cause no one seem to look at me
luckily my cousin were there and to distract me from swearing here and there,i play with'em ignoring my pathetic brother,wht a loser he is for being tht kind of person in the wrong time.

i know tht he's trying the best to change his lil sis into a better person but sorry to say bro,"i won't listen to you if tht the way you treat me or 'berdakwah' to me!"
but i promise myself to wear hijab next year ignoring wht people are going to say to me,tht's my promis andi'm going to stick with it...


mood:irritated and suffering! :(

p/s:somehow i manage to say this,SELAMAT HARI RAYA people!